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Trust is a decision

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I always read that
Trust is supposed to be earned, that
Trust is something you give away
To somebody who showed that he or she deserves it

At first I agreed
Yes indeed
This is what trust is all about
Then I discovered that

Trust isn’t something another person earns from you
Trust is something you decide to give
You don’t wait for the other one to deserve it
You decide to trust

Trust is an active decision of yours
As well as forgivness
As well as resentment
The only thing that is not a choice nor a decision is love

Love is not a choice nor a decision
Love is life
A gift, an opportunity, a suffering, a joy and absolutely
No control

When I trust someone
It’s a decision I make
That person doesn’t have to prove anything to me
It’s my call, it’s my choice, it’s my risk

And there are moments in life
When you have to be the one who shows trust first
Even when there is nothing to be sure of
Except from your own decision to trust



  1. I had never looked at it that way, and it really makes sense. How will you know exactly up to what extent a person to go through to be able to gain your trust if it is not you who realizes that it is time to grant it? Something that really made me rethink the whole “You’ve gained my trust” phrase.

    Liked by 1 person

    • yesyoucan111 says:

      Thank you so much for your thoughts about my words. Yes, I rethought that phrase when I stood in a situatioin that I had to decided to trust a person I just met. Or decide not to trust him. I didn’t know his history nor his intention. But I knew mine. And I trusted my gut instinct. And I took the decicion to trust him, and I own that decision. And if I had been wrong trusting him, he had not let me down, I owned my decision to trust. In my case I wasn’t wrong. I still trust this person with my life and he trust me with his life.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes, exactly! The only intentions, actions and thoughts we can be certain of at our own, and the decision of trusting someone lays purely on us. Like you mention, if they do something that makes you loose the trust you had in them or not, that depends on them, but only you can take the initiative of opening up.

        Liked by 1 person

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